2 Mommies and a Baby

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Friday, October 06, 2006

jumping without a chute

I haven't always been the most confident person. Some people may be surprised to hear that, but it's true. Sometimes, you really need to dig deep to make yourself believe in yourself. Does that make sense?

Well...

It’s official.

I did it.

I have been job searching since May and a week ago, thought I had a winner. Then, the dream-tough-money-opportunity job that I interviewed in May was ready to hire. They wanted a second interview.

I have a confidence problem where I allow myself to believe that I am only as capable as my current boss treats me. I thought this dream-tough-money-opportunity job would be way over my head. I didn’t think I had the brains and class that they were looking for.

Then, a funny thing happened.

I got an offer...an offer that I never saw coming.

In the past few days, I have done some soul searching and am vanquishing the fears I allowed to creep up.

I am allowing the positive affirmations in and am disposing of the negative right now. This is a big thing for me.

I have accepted this offer at this firm that I never thought would even give me an interview. I accepted the offer because I know I can do this.

I was a bartender/waitress that decided to go to law school. I don’t think many people thought I could get through it, but I did. And I did well, dammit. I was President of student government, president of the GLBT law society, senior notes editor on a law journal, working in the practice clinic, even getting an award for practice and procedure, and getting pretty darn decent grades. And, then I passed the CT and NY bar exams on the first try.

Dammit, I am good enough for a job like dream-tough-money-opportunity job and they seem to think so too! I will seize this opportunity and prove myself right that I am capable.

It has been a long week with a lot of things swirling around in my head. On Monday, I was not thinking positive at all. On Wednesday, I was a basket case. I had two offers, one disappointing, the other overwhelming. That should not be considered a problem.

So, here we are. This is a big step. This is a step out of the comfort zone and into a big challenge with big opportunity.
posted by Holly at 4:17 PM

6 Comments:

CONGRATULATIONS!!!! It is scary to take such a big step but obviously you are very capable and they want you! You will exceed at your job, I'm sure. It's hard to be confident sometimes and I know I let myself get into a rut with my work at times, thinking I can't possibly do something else/more. I'm glad you had the courage to take such a major step and I'm sure you'll be happily rewarded for it.

5:08 PM  

Rock on, Sister! When do you start?

2:41 PM  

Thank god! I am so happy you got a good paying job, finally!! You deserve this and are MORE than capable. Call me if you need anything.

3:41 PM  

Happy shouts for you from us! Big steps mean big opportunities and big rewards. Go for it with gusto girl!

5:37 PM  

Congratulations!

9:19 AM  

no words can describe the happiness i feel for you leaving GGW - you GO girl!

10:44 PM  

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